Sorry, but it’s the only other Yazz I have ever heard of (ask your mum). Tonight, as with all good things, The Apprentice 2009 came to an end. And The Apprentice this year was, I believe the best by far. Not in the extravagance of the tasks, but in the number of actual business-minded professionals, who could seriously contend for the winner’s spot. We may well look back fondly to previous seasons, and point to the characters and dramatic events. But for all those who have gone on to do well (yes even the TV slebs), each of the previous years had a greater number of lightweights and slackers than 2009 has. From this year’s bunch, I’d say a good 50% were capable, intelligent, ambitious professionals, who would succeed in most business environments. I know I personally would hire a few of them. No there wasn’t a Badger, but how often do Badgers appear anyway.
The Task: This week’s task for the Final, between Yasmina Warrior Queen and the ever fragrant Kate, was to devise a brand new concept for a box of chocolates, from the chocolate, to the packaging, to the marketing, pricing and advertising. No sales were required, just a unique concept that would impress a panel of chocolate industry experts (I’d love to be at their Christmas parties), and of course Sir Alan Sugar – the employer to be. Firstly, they were to choose team members from some of their previous competitors. Notably absent were Noorul, Anita, and Majid. In selecting their teams like kids playing football in the playing ground, Kate pointedly avoided choosing her paramour Philip, for fear of his presence diverting her attention in the task. This tack certainly seemed to work well, when Kate’s team started off on all the right tracks. They produced a quality concept, beautiful chocolates with an edgy TV advert, but fell down on their cost for the target market, at £13. Why they didn’t fib and say it was do-able for £8.99 I don’t know. Yasmina’s team, conversely, set off on a course that they had to correct quickly, when a focus group said clearly that guys simply won’t buy chocolates for themselves, nor do they want them as gifts. I’m sure there is a study somewhere, which says chocolate only goes particularly well with oestrogen.
The Boardroom: I don’t quite know how much they had to drink, but it was remarkable just how collective smoke was being blown up the backsides of the Finalists by their respective teams. I did a double take myself, when Debra was most effusive in her compliments for Kate. In his summary, Sir Alan was impressed with both, but characterised his decision as follows. Kate who won one task as a PM, but has failed to show a drive and enthusiasm that would mark her out as exceptional. Yasmina, who had won 3 tasks as PM, but has already seen the other side of the curtain, which separates employers and employees, and isn’t entirely convincing SAS in her desire to work for him. Ultimately, I think that Sir Alan’s vanity had a little to do with his decision. He concluded that Yasmina was the more talented of the two, and that she was so besotted with him that she would sacrifice her own entrepreneurial career to work alongside him. That sacrifice, and by extension the flattery of it, is what I believe made the difference. He is also on record, from several weeks ago, as wanting someone who was a bit of a maverick to win this year, as those are the people he believes can collectively revitalise business and commerce in the UK, at its time of greatest need. That was the difference that separated Kate and Yasmina, and ultimately led to the phrase – Yasmina, You’re Hired!
There is no hiding place as each of them is grilled by four of Sir Alan’s trusted business colleagues. It is a test of character as every aspect of their personal and professional lives is put under the microscope.
The candidates all set out to prove what they are made of, but Sir Alan is not in the market for a TV presenter. He wants someone with real business flair, and the task is designed to see who can identify the right products for the right market and sell the most.
With hundreds of other exhibitors at the show, competition is fierce. So can the candidates adapt their usual hard-sell techniques? And will the mums and dads prove better at selling than those without children?
The teams have just two days to produce an eye-catching series of posters and an information-packed leaflet that will attract new tourists to the town. They must then pitch their campaigns to tourism industry experts and to the residents and dignitaries of Margate.
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